So, in my fantastical scenario or novel or screenplay called GARBAGE: The trashing of small business in the BIG CITY, it starts like this:
DISCLAIMER:
Quantified and Qualified
This is a totally made up fictional expose. Nothing that you
might choose to read in the following ever, ever….ever happened. Its all
fiction and not based on any real events. The names didn’t need to be changed
because the characters inside this Totally Fictional Expose couldn’t possibly
exist in the real world. J
YAWN
It always begins with a yawn…or it should. I hate to wake up
with a jolt of reality too strong and too clear. I prefer to gently maneuver my mind from the surreal to the
real. And strong coffee is the stimulant of choice to get my juices flowing.
…and so it was, Mr. Mayor Man stirred from his sleep and
without a conscious thought reached over and hit the button on his nightstand.
He reached for his glasses and turned on the lamp on his nightstand. The big
clock on the mantle of his over sized fireplace said 5:30 and it was still
quite dark. Mr. Mayor Man, known to me as MMM, quickly sat up and let his feet
fall to the floor searching for his slippers. As he stood up and smoothed out
his silk pajamas he heard a screeching sound outside. MMM moved to the window
just slowing his pace to reach for his dark blue robe. He came to a halt at the
window and as he slipped his arms into his robe MMM saw something he’s seen
before but it had a strange and wondrous resonance in his mind and on the wet
street below.
It had rained hard all night and MMM had trouble staying in
bed. He did his usual sleep mantra he concocted years ago.
In his head he went through the litany:
I send my unconditional love to the light
I send my unconditional love to the keepers of the light
I send my unconditional love to the high……
And slipped back into sleep.
It had been a tough day at City Hall that day. Though he was
known as a mega businessman and a trillionaire to boot, he couldn’t get a grasp
on how to resolve the immediate disaster that was facing the Big City. Now,
standing at the window he saw the cause of the screech that roused him. He also
found the solution to his most aggravating concern. He thought, clichés are
great, because a light bulb just went off in my head. It was if the dark clouds
cleared and the sun streamed down and settled on this extraordinary sight, a
city tow truck driving off with a baby blue sedan with out of state plates
attached to its rear like a giant blue tuna ready to be butchered and served at
one of the top sushi restaurants in the neighborhood. MMM’s head was reeling;
he reached for one of the phones on his bedroom desk.
“John here Mr. Mayor Man”
“John, I just got this idea to solve our fiscal problems”
“Yes sir, what were you thinking?”
“But first, we can’t write down any of this and we can’t go
public. It all has to be on the super duper hush”
“Sir.”
“John, stop with the sir thing. You know it drives me crazy.
If you must call me mayor but after all these years we could go back to just
Steve.”
“Sorry. Mayor, you are on a secure phone?”
“ John, I have like a dozen phones here. Call me back in ten
minutes on a secure one and get someone to change it to a red one today”
“Yes s….Mayor. I’ll call you in ten”
“Great”
MMM had to pee bad and he hated to be on the phone when he
was doing so. He had an issue with knowing someone could hear him and a real
issue of having dropped his phone in the toilet too many times.
Ring, Ring……
“Mayor”
“Hey John. So, I woke up to this city tow truck towing a car
away and this flashed off in my mind. Let’s ticket everybody and everything.
Have every agency start enforcing ever regulation and issue violations.” Now,
you have to understand MMM was very excited about this idea and John, knowing
the mayor, listened closely. The mayor had gotten here by being creative in business,
by not coming across as ruthless and giving the appearance of worldly
experience and community concern.
“Look John, this is a rental town. People come here to
achieve something so they will forget other things. If we slowly and surely
implement a strategic policy that creates a new and huge source of revenue.”
“I think I see where you going with this Mayor.”
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